Not worth the time

[levi]

here I stand
head in hand
(T U R N M Y F A C E T O T H E W A L L)

Levi loved having a random study hall stuck into the middle of his morning. Not. Seriously, what was the use? If his schedule had worked out properly, like it was supposed to, he would have been in calculus at the moment, possibly learning something that could help him get into a good school and as far away from this God-forsaken town as humanly possible. (Okay, not really that far. But the other side of the country was appealing at the moment. Somewhere where they might have heard of Joshua, but wouldn't know that Levi was his younger, much less screwed-up brother. (And he wasn't all to sure on the less screwed-up part.) So yeah, he would have much preferred to be in class at the moment, instead of being sprawled out on one of the worn couches in the student lounge.

This early in the day, it wasn't very crowded, so the tall boy had chosen a full-length couch to stretch out on. He lay on his stomach, his feet kicked up in the air, with his nose buried in a disappointingly average pulp thriller. He shifted a little, wincing as he accidentally brushed the large, fresh bruise on his side against the back of the sofa. (It was hidden by a hoodie, so if there were any observers to the wince, they would not know the source of the pain.) He tried to ignore his discomfort, both at the bruise and at being one of the few in the lounge who wasn't currently hanging out with someone. It was only a couple weeks into his junior year of high school, but he was already getting used to being on his own a lot of the time.

Even before the end of last year, Levi had never been the most popular kid. He was never the one surrounded by a huge group of friends, never the one sought out for parties. But it had been better than the actual shunning he was receiving all too often this year. What hurt the most, though, was that people he had considered his friends were more withdrawn as well. Of course, he had spent the summer with his aunt and uncle in Minnesota, as his parents were considering moving away from the town Joshua had more or less destroyed. But for some reason, they had decided to stay, and no amount of pleading from Levi had gotten them to move on the subject of him changing schools.

The teenager sighed, not even really paying attention to what he was reading. He didn't understand why his parents had declared that he had to stay at Carson. Maybe they were attempting to convince the community that at least one of their sons had been raised right? Levi smirked to himself, as he wasn't sure how they would react if they knew all his secrets. Maybe he was a bit morbid, but he thought that they would probably consider him another failure as a son. It's tragic, isn't it, when children turn out badly? Just the thought of coming out to them was enough to make him wince. His mom would probably start crying, and his dad might want to kick him out of the house. (He had read more than his share of horror stories online, and had let his imagination run away with how ugly the reactions could be.)

Levi rolled over, onto his back. He hissed slightly as he again jostled the fresh bruise on his side, then tried to make himself comfortable enough to read properly. It just wasn't happening, the couch was too old and was poking awkwardly into his back. Again, the junior sighed, this time over his discomfort. Why couldn't there be enough nice, cushy chairs for everybody in this stupid lounge? There were enough for one small group of people, but even if he had claimed one before any one else got there during study hall, he would be shooed away.

'That's my lot in life now, an outcast.' Levi thought, as he dropped the novel he didn't really want to read onto the floor. But he couldn't blame them, not really. If someone else's older brother had shot up the school, he would probably be avoiding the younger sibling as well. Understanding that didn't make him feel any less lonely though.

Status: Donezo!
Words: 723 (no codes)
Tag: Hannah
Lyrics: The Beatles, duh
Credit: Tony
Notes: First RP post!

[hannah nicole callihan]

when my time comes, forget the wrong that ive done
HELP ME LEAVE BEHIND SOME REASONS TO BE MISSED.
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

[/b][/color]she said, ignoring some of the stares she was getting.
[/ul][/size]

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
DON'T RESENT ME WHEN YOU'RE FEELING ANGRY
keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest

[/b][/color] levi icarus campbell
music. linkin park
wearing. coming soon
words. 818
graphics. JAMIE ALL OVER
template. La-La-Lia
notes. here[/ul][/size]

[levi]

if she's gone
i can't go on
(F E E L I N G T W O F O O T S M A L L)

Levi tried once again to get himself absorbed in the book, but it just wasn't going to happen. Just like he wasn't going to find a comfortable position on this freaking couch. The junior moved again, searching for the unlikely comfort, before giving up, again. If he was more self-assured, he would probably have dared to move to a different couch, one closer to the group of laughing students on the other side of the room. But he wasn't. He was timid and quiet and he hated himself for it.

But right now wasn't a good time to get into an introspective, self-loathing session. That was what creative writing class was for. (Just kidding.) He wasn't about to pour all of his secrets into a poem that the entire class would read. Most of his problems were very specific, and everyone would know it was him instantly. And he wasn't all that creative either. He had talents elsewhere, like with computers and things like that. Practical talents, for things that fit together in predictable ways and did not rely on emotions for their quality.

When Levi heard someone speak, he sat upright quickly, curious about who in their right minds would want to talk to him. Of course, he neglected to anticipate the pain that would cause him. Damn. He had probably bruised a rib or something. Hissing slightly in discomfort, he slid over, making room for the younger girl on the couch. He nodded in response to her question, and, as if the nodding an the sliding over weren't enough, he spoke, "Oh, sure Hannah, you are always welcome." As always, his tone was slightly formal and very polite. If there was anything that Levi really did not want to do, it was offend someone. So he was overly polite to people, especially his friends. He couldn't afford to lose any, as it was not likely he would find any new ones any time soon.

Even though Hannah seemed capable of ignoring the odd looks that followed them, Levi really could not. He had tried, valiantly. But still, it seemed, at least to the junior, that eyes followed him everywhere. He felt paranoid, but he really was not making it up. People were watching him and what he did. And they did have a decent reason to, after all. Sometimes, even he wondered if he could possibly follow in his brother's footsteps...

With a quick shake of his head, he tried to clear that mental image from his mind. No. He was nothing like Joshua. Levi was resigned to spending the rest of his high school years stuck in Carson, so he didn't even like to imagine doing what Josh had done. Even if everyone else in the school thought he was capable of it.

But Levi wasn't going to dwell on that now. Because now, at least, Hannah was there. And even though he didn't know her all too well, she was friendly, and that was all he needed. He shrugged at her complaint about her roommates. He had shared a room with Josh when they were younger, but he hadn't had to share one in years. He was one of the few kids who did not live in the dorms on the campus, but instead lived in his family home in town. (His parents thought it silly to pay extra for the room and board when Levi lived within walking distance of the school.) "I guess I'm lucky. I haven't had to share my room since I was really little." He smiled at the younger girl, "Roommates would probably drive me nuts."

The boy noticed the bookbag that Hannah still held. She probably had classes to go to in a little while. Well, at least that was a good conversation topic. "What classes do you have today?" Levi asked politely, gesturing to the bag he assumed was filled with books and papers. Though he had taken the same classes two years ago, he wouldn't mind talking them, if she wanted to. Hell, they could talk about fish sticks if it meant that Levi wouldn't be spending another free period reading terrible fiction as he tried to pretend that he did not care if others spoke to him or not.

As for himself, he could have been doing a bit of studying for his Physics test that was coming up at the end of the week, but he really did not want to. He disliked the subject greatly, even though it was one of his best. Levi preferred Biology and even Chemistry to Physics, though his father had informed him that he should study all he could if he ever wanted to be a fighter pilot. (No, Levi had never expressed interest in that job, it was just something his father would say every now and again.)

Status: Complete
Words: 806
Tag: Hannah
Lyrics: The Beatles, duh
Credit: Tony
Notes: A little rambly, sorry about that.

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